The Best Parenting Tool Ever – The Magic Wand

The Best Parenting Tool Ever – The Magic Wand

magic wandYou have found it! The best parenting tool ever! The magic wand. Tell folks you found it right here for free. It slices. It dices. It helps your kids deal with problems without even existing. What? Tell me more!

Helping Kids with their Problems

So how does it work? When your child comes to you with a problem, first off you have to listen to their story. Nod your understanding. Paraphrase their words back. Get down on their level so they can see the concern in your face. Pat them on the back and give them a hug if they need it. Sometimes that’s enough.

But sometimes they still have long faces and tears still dripping. Perhaps their favorite teddy bear has been lost forever, you can’t afford to buy them that $700 toy or their life’s masterpiece à la crayon has been accidentally shredded and they found the evidence in the recycling bag. These things happen.

Bring out the Magic Wand

This is when you can bring out the magic wand. You say, “Oh dear. If only I had a magic wand. Why, if I had a magic wand, I would make those tears disappear instantly. I would have your teddy bear here in a shake of the wand. And Teddy would be at his grandest. A flick of the wand and his matted grungy fur would be magically shampooed to perfection. He would get a black top hat and a fancy purple-and-green suit for his return. And little black shoes with gold buckles. Why he would even be swinging a cane. He would come home singing and dancing. In fact, he would bring a troupe of dancing bear friends with him and they would perform an acrobatic musical number right here in the kitchen. Could you imagine that?”

The Trick to the Magic Wand

fairyThe trick to the magic wand is to build a grandiose story that your child can image and in fact want to build on. You want to capture their attention and their imagination. You want to show them that if you had magical powers, these are the things you would do for them. Go all out; let your imagination take you away. It will take your child away too. Visiting the land of Make Believe can be a great distraction from what ails you in the real world.

General Wish Making

There are many things my kids want, but we won’t be getting for a variety of reasons. Sometimes when then whine and whinge about something, I break out my magical wand for wishing. Instead of saying they will never get that $700 toy (they can eventually get it, when they are adults with jobs), I say I can see how much they really want it. I then invoke the power of the wand and talk about how we could magically have everything we want. I like to talk about what I would wish for too. My wish is for a black unicorn with wings and a purple horn. Instead of driving to work, I would get to ride a unicorn to work. This is my favorite go-to wish. Then the kids get in on it, wishing for all sorts of magical wonders or telling me that unicorns don’t really exist so I better be prepared for that reality. I get so into my description of the flying unicorn that I think they worry I’ll be disappointed with the car that will be taking us to work and school.

Keep Your Magic Wand Handy

Magic wands are irreplaceable, but the terrific thing is you need only mention them to draw on their magical powers. Remember to always keep one handy for situations where your child is having a difficult time. Make sure to truly listen to your child’s problem first and show empathy. They need to know you understand how they are feeling before you bring out something as powerful as a magic wand. May you have a sparkling day now.

By Miki Dare

writer and artist